Not much has changed since the last time you guys heard from me. I’m still in remission and relatively pain-free except on rainy days.
I’ve been seeing lots of new doctors lately for reasons not caused by my autoimmune disease (thankfully and surprisingly). The questions always start out the same: what medical conditions do you have? What medications are you taking?
My response is usually, “I have Rheumatoid Arthritis, but I’ve been taken off my medication because I’m in remission and symptom-free.” Normally, that’s a good enough answer. Some doctors might ask me how long I’ve been in remission for, which I think is a valid question.
That wasn’t a good enough answer for the last specialist I saw. “You know, doctors give symptoms labels just for insurance purposes. If you really had arthritis, you’d be in pain all the time. There’s no such thing as remission for that disease,” she said. She said something similar about a more recent medical diagnosis that I’ve been given.
Okay, I get it. You don’t want your patients to have self-fulfilled prophecies where they use the disease as an excuse for stuff. It does happen. But clearly lady, you don’t know me.
Personally, I think this is a dangerous game this “professional” is playing. For me, a diagnosis was a relief. I finally had a name for the suffering I’d been experiencing for quite a few years. In that sense, yes, I’m labeling.
But I’m labeling the condition. Not me. I don’t walk up to people and introduce myself like, “Oh hey! I’m Alyssa and I have RA.” Mostly because I’m an antisocial asshole and won’t walk up to you at all.
I also don’t think it’s fair for someone who isn’t personally experiencing what I’m feeling to tell me that my disease is not real or valid. Especially when said person is not a Rheumatologist. This woman hasn’t seen me at my worst, on the days where I was completely bedridden from the pain. I may not be suffering now, but my blood work has always said otherwise. There’s actually comfort in having a name for the monster you’re battling. It takes out the unknown that eats away at your psyche.
So, Lady-that-is-Having-Her-Credentials-Doubted-By-This-Person, I’m gonna stick with my labels, thank you very much. Until you can guarantee that I will never be sick or in pain ever again, or prove that I never had RA in the first place, I’m going to keep telling doctors that I have RA that’s lying dormant for the time being.