In an unfortunate twist of fate, I succumbed to the stomach flu this past Sunday, the night before I was supposed to go back to work after spring break. I’ll spare you the grotesque details of my illness, but let’s just say that it’s the worst I’ve felt in a long time. Thursday was the first time I was able to eat more than 6 saltine crackers and a banana in a day, but even now I can’t manage my average food intake.
I’m not someone who can take a day off. I’ve gone into work with head colds, laryngitis, accident injuries, and terrible RA flares. A workaholic, if you will. But this time, I couldn’t manage much more than to lay on the couch all day and sleep for 16 hours at a time, despite how much I desperately wanted to get up and answer my work emails. I didn’t have the energy to open a laptop or read a book. For the first time in a very long time, I went two whole days doing absolutely nothing. I couldn’t even pull that off back in February after my accident.
Sometimes I think I need these kinds of things to remind myself how I need to slow down and become more aware. I feel great now in terms of my RA. But the 4 days spent in bed were driving me absolutely insane. If a stomach virus was slowly killing my soul, then clearly I’m out of touch with the reality of having an autoimmune disease. If anything, this is one more reminder to appreciate how much I’m capable of doing at this point in my life. I’m not confined to just merely existing like so many others battling health issues, and while vomit is one of my worst fears ever, I’ll count this experience as a humbling moment.